Passages

Tonight's blog will be a little different than my other postings. Tonight I will tell a story of a very special family who made me one of their own 25 years ago.

Carol Erickson and I met when we were camp counselors in 1983. Carol had just broken up with a boyfriend, and her mother, Ruth, said, "You're not going to sit around the house all summer and sulk." So Ruth called a friend who was managing a YMCA camp, and he gladly took Carol on for the summer.

My first memory of Carol was on "Family Day," a day before the camp opened where our families could come see where we were going to be living for the summer. Ruth marched Carol around the camp and made her stand in front of just about every building so she could take a picture. At every stop, you could hear Carol whining, "Oh, Mommmmmmm...." and Ruth saying, "Oh, Carol, just get over there and stand in front of that building," using that mom staccato tone of voice where all the words kind run together.

My mom was with me as well that day, and we found it pretty darn funny to watch the two of them. In fact, we kind of shadowed them just to watch and listen. Hey, it was the 80's, and it was cheap entertainment.

Little did I know on that day that for many, many years to come, I would hear Ruth's voice, Carol's voice, and the voices of all of their family members as they laughed, fought, joked, and many times just enjoyed each other. You see, out of that camp counseling summer, Carol and I developed a friendship that has withstood time and distance.

The Ericksons bought a vacation home in Arcadia, Michigan, not long before Carol and I met. Carol began taking me there, and it wasn't long until I felt like I, too, was an Erickson. You see, her parents, Ruth and Edsel, were very welcoming to everyone, including me. For many years, Carol and I, and usually Carol's cousin Leslie, would vacation in Arcadia in July. It's on Lake Michigan, remote from the hustle and bustle of real life, and the perfect spot to just relax, have a beer, read a book, and take nap after nap. Over the years, the number of people who came to Arcadia in July grew and grew, and it wasn't unusual to have a group there that included people from Texas, Colorado, Ohio, and various other places. Ruth and Edsel made each one welcome, and everyone looked forward to their time with the Ericksons.

Ruth was a mom to everyone, making sure everyone was fed and had what they needed. Every night she would make a meal for us that was better than anything we had ever had before. We'd sit at the dining room table, all of us, making those "mmmmmm" noises and rolling our eyes because it was so good. I remember one particular meal where she served a side dish of green beans, and we went on and on and on about those beans. To this day I have no idea what she did to those beans, but I will tell you I never forgot how good they were. She never could get over how we could think green beans were that good. "They're just plain old green beans" she would say.

Usually each night we'd go for a walk around town. Ruth and her sister, Mary, would start out walking with us girls, but after a couple of blocks, they'd be left far behind. It was so cute to see the two of them talking and talking and talking and, yes, slowly walking. We'd taunt them every night, and every night they'd shoo us away.

One of my favorite memories of Ruth would happen every single year when we girls were getting ready to go to the beach. We would usually have some sort of alcoholic concoction; many times it would be those buckets that have alcohol added and then freeze in the freezer over night. Carol would always say, "I wonder how it knows that we did it at night? Would it still work if we did it in the daytime?" Yes, I do think she said that every year. Anyway, we'd be at the kitchen table discussing whether we needed more than just the tub of drinks and fighting over who was going to carry the heavy cooler. Of course we would have to sample the frozen tub, and we would offer some to Ruth. Ruth would reply that it was too early for a drink. Minutes later she would appear standing next to the table with a small juice glass, saying, "Well, just give me a taste." We would, and pretty soon she would have had several "tastes," but they didn't count because they were in such a small glass. That was Ruth!

Edsel was always so interested in everyone. He was the first "grown-up" who looked me right in the eye and asked me about myself. He truly cared about my answers. When I shared successes with him, you could see the pride in his eyes. When Carol, Leslie, and I would have our 20-year-old girl dramas, he would get a twinkle in those same eyes, and you could tell that he really did enjoy just listening to our view of the world. Only a man like Edsel would have been able to tolerate the three of us!

My favorite memories of Edsel, though, were when he'd pile all of us in the van and take us for ice cream in Frankfurt. Edsel loved his family, and Edsel loved his ice cream. We'd fight to see if we could pay before him, because he always wanted to treat. We'd sit outside the Kool Spot on the picnic tables, enjoying our nice cold ice cream, talking about what a great day it had been. And you know what, every day WAS a great day.

Along the way, all of the Erickson kids got married, and grandchildren came into the picture. Ruth and Edsel loved having the kids around and talked so much about how each one was doing this or that. Their pride was so evident. They built on to the house to accommodate the growing families, and they wanted everyone there just as much as possible.

When Randy made his first appearance, you would think he'd been coming there as long as I had. He was welcomed in as yet another member of the family, and to this day remarks at how special the Ericksons always made him feel.

I can mark history by my time in Arcadia. I was there when Greg LeMond won his first Tour de France. I learned to appreciate tennis by watching Wimbledon on the Erickson's 13-inch TV with no remote. The only times in my life that I have skied were times when I was staying in Arcadia (the world is actually probably a safer place given that I didn't take up that sport). I was in Arcadia when John Kennedy's plane was reported missing. Why can I remember that I was there for these events? Because my time in Arcadia was always special, and those times stand out in my mind. I never want to forget.

There were golf tournaments, complete with custom shirts and hats some years. There were all of the hundreds of sunsets we watched out over Lake Michigan. There were beach days, sunburns, and coolers full of ice cold drinks. There was the Airstream trailer that looked just like something Lucy and Desi would have had. There were trips to the Artesian well to fill all of those milk jugs.

There were times when we had to drive to the scenic lookout to get our cell phones to work. There were trips to the casino, including one time when the power in the casino went out. Boy those blackjack dealers can really move fast to get those chips put away when the lights go out!

There was the Arcadia song that Carol and her sister Ingrid made up, based on a song that Woody made up on "Cheers." It went like this:

Arcadia

Arcadia

You border on Lake Michigan

Your land is mostly mountainous

And your chief export is pie

There was Joey Vonk writhing around on the kitchen floor with a dead-on imitation of the Crocodile Hunter. To this day I don't think I've ever laughed as hard as I did that night, and I didn't even know who the Crocodile Hunter was at that time!

There was Joey's dad, John, telling us about the time that Edsel drove a new car to Florida and went on and on about what great gas mileage he got. John started sneaking out at night and putting extra gas in Edsel's car, so Edsel would keep bragging up how great his mileage was, not knowing that John was playing a prank on him. And there was Edsel, laughing along with us as John told the story, not the least bit upset at getting pranked.

There was smoked fish and always lots and lots of pie. There was the annual hot dog roast after the Arcadia Daze parade. There was the Arcadia Daze Dance, always full of some sort of teenage drama. There were all of the parties in the side yard, celebrations of life and family. There was the obligatory "everyone on the porch" picture, usually mandated by Ruth. We would moan and groan about it every year, but aren't we all so glad we have those pictures now.....

Ruth passed away suddenly two years ago, and it was heart breaking to all of us. We had a beautiful memorial service at the house, a celebration of her life and the wonderful person she was. And now, another memorial is being planned. Edsel passed away last night. Next Wednesday we will all again meet in Arcadia to say good-bye to this wonderful man, friend to all. As difficult as it is to think of Arcadia without Ruth and Edsel, the wonderful thing is that now they are together again, where they belong. Ruth and Edsel shared a love for life, a love for their family and friends, a love for each other, and a love for God. I know that they're dancing and hugging and loving each other, happy knowing that they lived full lives. I hope they know that their lives touched many others, changed many others, and we are all better people for knowing them. Edsel and Ruth, you are missed, and you will never be forgotten.